Happy #Halloween

Wishing everyone a Happy Halloween!

Our daughter is two things this year. For school, she brought her dragon and has no clue what to call herself besides the girl who crocheted her dragon some clothes. 

Tonight for trick or treating, she will be a werewolf. The no masks rule led to her not being able to wear this costume for school. It’s the updated version of a costume her brother had many years ago. 

She is recovering from an upper respiratory infection with ear involvement, so we are planning to trick or treat just as long as she feels up to it. 

What are your plans for tonight?


I wrote them a letter

Last night’s meeting did not go well at all. Ultimately, it resulted in me calling an end to the meeting and walking out. I ended up in tears out by the car. It is so frustrating. The law very clearly states that the parents can participate in every decision made regarding their child. Hell, doctor’s cannot take life saving measures on a child without informed parental consent. Why, exactly, would educator’s be awarded more decision making power than a surgeon?

As a response to my email stating that I learned that we were entitled to a due process hearing when we disagreed with their placement proposal, they have offered to start the evaluation process over again. We did not sign the paper last night. We brought them home to discuss our options and decide what we wanted to do. We will be signing the paper and turning it in to them today.

After last night’s complete failure of a meeting, I drafted a letter. This morning I edited it like any good piece of writing should be edited and sent it off in an email to as many people involved in the decision making process as I could think of. Here is a copy of that letter. Continue reading

I want to scream

I told you on Monday in Frustrated mom about how my daughter’s day at school went. I told you they once again put a “helper” on her who was anything but helpful. How they used known triggers to force her anxiety to skyrocket all day long and used it as an excuse to deny her access to class and keep her in the office for the last few hours of the day.

Last week was a successful week. Her teacher worked with her and helped her to cope with her anxiety and settle down. I have numerous emails back and forth between her teacher and I that show she is settling in and can find success.

But, her teacher wasn’t there on Monday. They tormented her and used her disability as a weapon against her. She then was dealing with a bullying situation on the bus. She went to the bus driver for help. Considering how high her anxiety already was, this is huge. She went to the grown up in charge. This is exactly what we encourage our children to do. This is what the anti-bullying campaigns in the nations schools tell our children to do. He refused to help her. She had an anxiety attack at the idea of having to return to that seat.

When they pulled her off of the bus instead of moving her seat, her anxiety became greater. She began throwing rocks at the staff who had been part of her torment all day. She feels guilty for throwing the rocks. She knows she did a bad thing. We had informed the school that we would be keeping her home the remainder of the camping trip and she would return to school on Thursday. The principal confirmed Thursday with my husband when he picked our daughter up from school Monday. Last night around 730 pm I received an email from the principal. Continue reading

Frustrated mom

I took the weekend off. I didn’t log into my blog. I didn’t post to Twitter. I took a break because I’m feeling frustrated. 

My daughter’s class is on their fifth grade camping trip. It’s a once in a lifetime field trip. You’re only in fifth grade once. 

They had a bunch of reasons. Her anxiety was one of them. Not being in the school last year when her classmates did fundraising. Meetings and deadlines happened during the two weeks we were gone and the one week they were denying her an education by denying her enrollment. Lots of excuses to keep her from the trip. 

But, nonetheless, she wanted to go to school today. She knew that a few of her friends would be staying behind with her. She went to school this morning with the mentality that she was ready to do whatever those left behind were told to do. At Friday’s meeting, we were told there would be things like movies. 

Instead, they were doing work. They also put a “helper” on her again. We withdrew consent for IEP testing and development when they refused to stop crowding her. When they were using it to increase her anxiety. Today went exactly like that week. Today, they used all the same methods on her that increased her anxiety so high. 

Without her teacher there, they went back to the same bullying tactics. They did not communicate with me once all day. They segregated her out for half the day into the “blue room” where they kept her with this alleged helper for the remainder of the day. 

On the bus, she has been having problems with her assigned seat and those seated around her. She went to the bus driver for help. He blew her off. She chose to go to the adult in charge. And she found no help from the kids who have been giving her a hard time and calling her names for the past week. 

She hit her breaking point. She lost it and found herself removed from the bus. Taken and held in the office again. Where the secretary calls to tell me that we need to come and pick her up. She doesn’t know why. She can’t answer any of my questions. I ask for someone who can give me information. I’m left on hold for 30 minutes. I finally got about ten minutes on the phone with the principal before my husband arrived to pick up our daughter. 

The story the principal told me about today and the one she told my husband are two different stories. Nothing is adding up. My daughter gets home, and I get her side. 

We revoked. How can they still implement these same horrible practices on her? Why would anyone want to hurt a child? 

I’m angry. I’m hurt. I’m sad. I’m frustrated. 

She won’t be returning to school until the camping trip is over. She won’t be there when her teacher is not. At every meeting we have explicitly explained that they were causing her anxiety with these practices. We removed consent because they were not willing to treat her appropriately. 

I emailed the principal after talking to my daughter. I was very direct as to how they caused her anxiety to be high again. How they used her disability as a weapon against her and forced her into an episodic state. I once more reminded them that the law is very clear. 

I don’t want to fight a legal battle. My daughter will only suffer more. But, I’m about ready to take it to a courtroom. I’m about ready to hire a lawyer and fight for my daughter’s right to be treated like a human being. 

I don’t want to be the angry blogger. I don’t want to spend my days fighting a system that is corrupt and broken. I just want my daughter to be given the same rights as anyone else. I wanted my daughter to have fond memories of school. I want her to feel safe when she gets on that bus in the morning. I want her to know that she is awesome and sweet and wonderful. I want her to know happiness and success. I want her to BE.